Imagine a world where we didn’t speak, read, or use sign language. What would we do? How would we connect with people without written, verbal, or body language? It’s a little scary to think of such a world, yet, sometimes people in our world are almost living this way.

They’re not literally living without communication, but they are so unaware of others in their lives that they might as well be. We all know people like this and who desperately need communication skills training!

Three quick questions:

1. When you are speaking and the other person is silent, do you stop and ask questions to make sure that your message is being understood?
2. When something isn’t working for you, do you start with the “I” message, or do you blame by starting with “You make me…”
3. Do you ask the other person to paraphrase what you’ve said, to make sure he/she comprehends?

In order to get to the HEART of Communication, it’s important to realize this very simple point: Communication is a two-way street. This means that in order to get your point across, you’ve got to make sure that your listeners understand what you’re saying.

Begin with this exercise in your communication skills training:

Imagine that you and your boss, co-worker, employee—anyone with whom you come into daily contact with where communication is crucial—are having a significant conversation, discussion, or transaction.

Imagine this in the most ideal situation possible. In this exercise, pay very close attention to the important words that you and the other person are using. Stop and write them down, if you need to, in order to remember them. (It’s not important to remember every word, just the major ones that make this conversation successful!)

Do the same with body language. Notice how s/he and you position yourselves. Write down or simply remember what is important.

Pay attention to what your thoughts and feelings are, too. What does your HEART say when you have a great conversation with someone?

Compile all this data from your imaginary conversation, then answer these questions:

What makes an absolutely successful discussion, conversation, or transaction with someone else?
What are all the elements?

Now imagine your last conversation, discussion, or transaction with that same person.

How did it compare?
What was different?
How was it different?
Most importantly, what can you do to make your next interchange more successful?

What does compassionate communication mean to you?
How can you become more compassionate as a communicator?

Are you ready, able, and willing to change your environment to bring successful communication into your workplace?

It’s up to you.

For expert facilitation of questions such as these, contact:

Suzy Allegra, entrepreneur, artist, and author of How to Be Ageless: Growing Better, Not Just Older!, and Where’s Your Organization’s HEART? Questions to Propel Your Business to Greatness. Suzy helps organizations pump up their bottom line and expand their heart through employee retention. Through her art-based presentations and other media tools, clients learn how to lead more productive and fulfilling lives. She can be reached at: (602) 331-3929; toll-free: (866) JOY2AGE, or email: suzy@suzyallegra.com

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