Confidently Coping with Change, Part 1
Change as a Way of Life
Arghh!#z//!*#^! New regulations are causing more paperwork and less time for your real job; your organization is merging with another and no one knows how the restructuring will ultimately affect them. The latest in technology lasted only ten minutes (or so it seemed) and now your company is scrambling to keep up with what is “hot” this minute.
Meanwhile, there’s constant change on the home front, too. Perhaps you’ve got a seriously ill parent, who needs care, or your child is graduating from high school and you will soon have an empty nest to deal with, or maybe your marital struggles are finally subsiding, but that’s only because you’re getting a divorce.
Does some of this sound familiar (especially if you substitute a few of the details)? It should, because this is life in the 21st century—fast-paced, constantly changing, and potentially full of stress.
How you deal with the continual changes taking place in your life makes a great difference on your mental, emotional and physical wellbeing—in your work, your relationships and with your health.
When faced with change, you can be tense, experiencing stress-induced physical symptoms, depressed and angry, or you can experience joy (in addition to all the other emotions), feel healthful, and know that you are doing well considering your circumstances. It all depends on your ability do adapt and follow-through.
There are skills you can learn to confidently cope with change. These competencies will enhance your ability to live a healthy, happy, and productive life, no matter what kind of transition you’re going through.
Positive Coping
One of the first aspects of handling constant change effectively is to learn to use positive coping strategies. These are behaviors, attitudes, and activities that reduce your stress without compromising your health.
For example, playing tennis, taking a hot bath, meditating, or pulling weeds are good ways of coping. When you find enjoyable activities that help you deal with the mental, emotional, and physical stresses of change, you will be using positive coping behaviors.
Overeating, consuming large quantities of caffeine, alcohol or other drugs, or becoming a serious couch potato are examples of negative coping behaviors. Abusive behavior, constant sleeping, or isolating yourself from others are also ways that detract from your ability to deal triumphantly with transitions.
These negative coping mechanisms will stop you from achieving professional and personal success. Yet, these are some of the typical behaviors many people use to avoid taking charge of their lives when they find their changing circumstances overwhelming.
When you are able to take charge of your life—the part that you can control—you will find that the changes taking place don’t affect you as seriously as before.
Fear
One of the greatest roadblocks to success in handling transitions is fear. It could be fear of risk-taking, fear of the unknown, or any number of fears. Allow yourself to feel the fear, then let go of it, so that it won’t paralyze you. Fear is good in small doses. It awakens you to a possible danger and signals that something different needs to be done.
For example, if you lose your job, your fear will help you set healthy limits on spending until you find a new one. But if you let fear overtake you, you may end up mentally or emotionally paralyzed—unable to put together a resume or make calls to find a new job. People tend to hold onto their fear long past its positive effects. Then fear becomes a hurdle that makes their lives more stressful and complicated.
If you are guilty of using some of the negative coping mechanisms mentioned earlier, you could be behaving in those ways because of your fears. Even if your fear is so subtle that you are now saying, “But I don’t have any fear!” it can stop you from making the choices best for you.
Learn how to overcome the fear, whether it’s blatant or subtle, so that is won’t become the greatest barricade of all to your success in any endeavor. When you choose healthy coping mechanisms and when you recognize your fears and move through them, you’ve just taken the first step toward confidently handling change!
Confidently Coping with Change, Part 2
