Becoming Balanced, Part 2
Staying the Course and Sustaining Joy
Taking Risks
Once you know the direction you want to go and you’ve got an idea of how to get there, you must leap. This may be the hardest step of all because it means taking a chance—risking failure (or real success). What’s more, there will be no one else to blame for an unhappy life. Yet, it will be a time of being in control of your life. You can do this—with perseverance and patience, focus and flexibility.
The Two P’s and Two F’s
These two “P’s” are necessary for just about everything in life. Whether your life feels balanced or not, you’ll need these to find joy at any given moment.
Perseverance is necessary to achieve any goal. This means not letting the setbacks (and there will be those!) stop you from moving forward again. It can be very demoralizing to see your progress eliminated in the blink of an eye. You will have to ask yourself how committed you are to having what you want. If you are committed to a dream, you’ll need to find the resilience to pick yourself up again when things have not turned out as planned.
Patience is a partner to perseverance. The saying, “Rome wasn’t built in a day,” is a very tired, but true idiom. Because we live in an instant gratification culture, it can be difficult to hold your faith and keep aiming at your goals. Your patience will pay off, however, in having a more satisfying life.
Focus is what keeps you on target. Don’t let the distractions of everyday life scatter your energy. If you tell yourself that you need to exercise three times a week, put those times in your date book, in ink. Don’t let anything except an emergency stop you. This would be true with setting aside a certain percentage of your income or making time to do research for a new career.
Flexibility is necessary for allowing your dream to change. After a period of time, you may decide that you would rather find a job with another company and not completely change careers, or that you’d rather travel to South America instead of Europe, or that you fell in love with New York City and want to give up the idea of rural living. Be open to new possibilities coming in surprising ways.
Finding Joy Now
In the meantime, as you are building a life you want, what can you do to make this time the best time that it can be? First, you must give up doing some things and create more space—breathing space, living space, playing space, in your life. When you live a rushed and harried life, there is little that will satisfy you unless you slow down and relax.
Write down ten things that you love to do—that bring you great pleasure (not just a dulled, zoned out feeling). Which of these can you do alone? Without much money? Start now by giving yourself one of these pleasures at least once a week—no excuses! When you start taking care of yourself in this way, you will find yourself in a better mood, getting along better with your family and colleagues, and generally less stressed.
While you are doing one of these pleasures it is essential to be “in the moment.” In other words, appreciate and enjoy each moment you are experiencing. If you are thinking about the laundry, the dentist, or the problem at work, you are defeating the purpose of this exercise.
Attitude, Gratitude, and Spiritual Connection
Your perspective will have the greatest impact on the joy you are able to have in your life. When you notice what doesn’t work, your attitude will be a negative one. When you find the good in a situation, you will be less stressed and be better able to cope with difficult times. Your attitude is just that—yours. Only you can change how you perceive the circumstances of your life. Each time you notice and appreciate something wonderful, you will be helping yourself be optimistic and joyful.
Lastly, peace of mind and joy are found when you feel connected to Something Bigger—your spiritual relationship. Whatever words you choose to use to describe this Presence in your life, it’s your deeply felt connection that is important. Pray or meditate, be still or walk in nature—do whatever you need to do to find and connect with your Source. When this part of your life is fulfilling, you will have the foundation for living and loving your life—in balance.
